Well, last night was my final full night as a bachelor. My wife returns tonight, so I’ll probably spend the evening folding laundry and making the house look nice before it’s time to pick her up from the airport. I like to be a good little house-husband when I can. But, anyway, back to my final evening as a bachelor.
I don’t think it would be fair to end this investigative series without mentioning that as a bachelor this week I have stayed at work late every evening. Normally I’m sneaking out the door at quarter till, but this week I’ve been staying until after 5 pm, which goes against everything for which I stand. I guess, truth be told, when there isn’t someone waiting at home for you, there’s a lot less motivation to actually get there. I’m pretty lucky.
Once I actually got home I had to rush and clean up the house because I had company coming over. I’m not sure if a normal bachelor would clean his apartment before his friends came over, but since one of my friends was of the female variety, I felt compelled to make sure the place was presentable. I think most bachelors would, at least, agree to that. If a woman is coming over you want to dump the old pizza boxes, and put away the laundry. So, that’s what I did. I put the dirty laundry in the hamper and moved the clean, yet to be folded, laundry to the bedroom where it would be out of sight. I even did a little vacuuming. I have to say, once I was done the place looked pretty good. It’s funny how company is such a motivating factor to get a place clean.
After my cleaning spree I had a little time before my friends were to arrive so I hopped into my car and drove around the corner to grab some food. I realize that a lot of my “investigative report” has been about me, as a bachelor, eating. As near as I can tell a bachelor’s life during the work week consists of sleep, work, eat, and sleep, with some more eating interspersed in there. I’m sorry if that sounds boring, but I hypothesize that a bachelor’s life really is only interesting on the weekend. I’ll have to put this to test some time, but that will have to be left for another series of repots.
Once I had secured my evening meal, I raced home to consume it before my friends arrived. Since nothing else was going on I turned on the TV to help with the digestive process. After flipping the channels for a few moments I came across the movie “Final Destination 2” so I watched that until my friends arived for the evening’s festivities. If you’ve ever seen the movie you’ll know that there’s nothing like watching people meet their doom in crazy unimaginable ways while eating your dinner.
About 45 minutes into the movie my friends arrived and it was time to settle into our evening’s activity, watching Lost. And that pretty much sums up my last evening as a bachelor because I went to bed pretty soon after my friends left.
It has been an interesting three days for me. I’d like to say I’ve learned a lot about being a bachelor, but the truth of the matter is, I never really arrived at true bachelor status. Yes, I had the apartment to myself for three days, but there was always the reality that my wife would be coming home by the end of the week. I may have partaken in a few bachelor-like activities, but I cannot claim that I WAS a bachelor.
To all you true bachelors out there: I respect you and your way of life.